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Archive for 2011|Yearly archive page

RVing-Casino/Campgrounds(5,6)

In Information-Usefull, postaweek2011, RVing on April 30, 2011 at 1:57 am

Casino Queen Hotel  Casino RV Park (East  St. Louis, Illinois)

From a lawn chair in their campsites, RVers can look across the mighty Mississippi River and watch the setting sun bathe the St Louis Arch in golden light.

Casino Queen RV Park

Casino Queen RV Park


In the foreground of this gorgeous vista sits the Casino Queen Hotel and Casino, a short shuttle-ride away from the RV sites, some of which are 70 feet long and all of  which are carefully maintained. Although the 142-site RV park is closed  November through February, the Casino is open tear round, and Casino Player magazine has consistently rated the Casino Queen’s  slots among the  country’s loosest. The fact that the Casino also offers $2 blackjack and 25 cent roulette doesn’t tip the odds in the players  favor, but it certainly eases the pain of a losing streak.

Casion Queen RV Park

Of course, if  RVers decide to stay at the Casino Queen RV Park, they will likely feel victorious on all fronts if they watch one of the casino’s  shows, eat at its  fine Prime Steakhouse and explore the nearby  St. Louis Zoo, the Science Center as well              as Laciede’s  Landing. 



Casino Queen RV Park (800) 777-0777,www.casinoqueen.com

Coushatta Casino Resort/Red Shoes RV Park (Kinder,Louisiana)

Palm Trees at Coushatta RV Resort


In the southwestern part of the Pelican State, 23 miles north of I-10, sits an establishment that understands quality and delivers it in spades. And hearts and clubs and diamonds. Coushatta Casino Resort features more than 2,800 slot machines, more fhan 70 table games and a 22-table poker room,where Texas Hold’em can be played legally,unlike in the neighboring Lone Star State. The entertainers who play Coushatta include the biggest of big names, such as Reba McEntire, and the casino features six restaurants under its roof. The adjacent golf course, Koasati Pines at Coushatta, may be a tongue-twister, but it also has received a 4.5-star rating from Golf Digest, and golfing RVer will likely warm to the fairways that wind  through wetlands among pines and the live oaks.

Indian Dance ai Coushatta




The adjacent Red Shoes RV Park has enough amenities –a two acre lake, tennis, basketball, volleyball and shuffleboard courts; a swimming pool, and two bathhouses, for example–to entertain those travelers who do not gamble or play golf. Though only about 300 yards sit between the casino and the RV park,a shuttle makes the trip easier, increasing the time in which to strike it rich.

Caushatta RV Park


Coushatta Casino Resort, (800) 572- 7263-www.coushattacasinoresort.com

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Chuckle for the day!

Freya was driving her Chevrolet Vega home in New Mexico when she saw an elderly Apache woman walking along the side of the road. She stopped the car and asked the woman if she would like a lift?
With a silent nod, the woman climbed into the car. Freya tried in vain to make conversation with the Apache woman.
The old Apache looked closely at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a red gift bag on the seat next to Freya.
‘What’s in the bag?’ asked the old woman.
‘It’s a bottle of whisky that I got for my husband.’
The Apache woman was silent for another minute or two. Then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said, ‘Good trade.’

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Up,Up, and Away!

In Uncategorized on April 28, 2011 at 1:30 am

Las Vegas

MGM Las Vegas

Here  we are here in Beautiful, Las Vegas, NV. This is the starting place for our much awaited “Up,Up and away” Balloon Festival Caravan, which ends in  Albuquerque, NM. in three weeks. We came here a week early so we could see some shows and other sights. One thing that I noticed that was interesting-the street signs are lighted so you can read them at night. I am glad that we did decide to give ourselves an extra week  because there is so much more to Las Vegas than just the the gambling. Carol has joined up with her friends   from N.Y.   June and I saw three shows and investigated the  Las Vegas area in general. We had to check out of our first camp  site here at the campground and moved over to where the caravan group of ” Up,Up and away ” are meeting. They have reserved camp sites. ( We had stayed at our first camp site  for 7 days and it only cost us, with gambling credits, $85.00 ).

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Today we relocated over to a new site assigned to us by our wagon master. After we got set up, we drove over to the Casino to a meeting room where we registered. We have been given #20 for this caravan. There are 24 units in this group. We returned again at 2:30 pm for the orientation meeting and to meet  our fellow travelers. The bus picked us up at 5:00pm and took us to the Excalibur Casino where we were treated to; “King Arthur’s Tourament.” with dinner and show. The dinner was served Medieval style – no utensils. A pewter mug & soup bowl. You drank soup from the bowl and ate a Cornish hen & a hunk of bread with your fingers while cheering your favorite knight on to victory in the tournament. The tables were arranged around an arena where the knights on horses competed. We had a great time!

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The next day the bus picked us up at 8:15 am for a boat ride on Lake Meade and a tour of Hoover Dam. The bus ride over gave us another chance to get better aqcuainted with our fellow travelers. The bus driver did a great job of keeping us informed about everything from “who owns what in Vegas” to stories about the building of Hoover Dam. (Our driver was an English Gentleman, not American and he did a great job). The boat trip was enjoyable. The Hoover Dam was certainly worth going to. It was started in 1931 and finished in 1935, two years ahead of schedule and one and a half million dollars under budget. (Total cost was 165 million dollars).

The 17 generators generate over two million Kilowatts—that is a lot of power. After we got back to the campground we had a travel meeting with Pat & Ken (wagon masters). They covered our next trip and what to expect on the road. We are free now until tomorrow. Carol’s friends are here and she is happy.

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Today  we are leaving Silverton’s  RV Park, Las Vegas, N V. For;    Brentwood RV Resort, Hurricane,UT. (You  do not travel in a group caravan, but singly or pairs etc ) . We gave the Las Vegas traffic a chance to thin out on I-15 north before we left. There is major construction going on here “to by-pass I-15 out to near the mountains” because here, in Las Vegas, it so loaded down with local traffic. I drove so June could enjoy the beautiful scenery of the Virgin River Gorge. We decided that because we only have about 100 miles to drive tomorrow, that we would briefly sight-see Zion Nat’l Park in the  morning before we left..We went down to the “before travel meeting”at  Pat & Kens RV and got some ideas of what to look for tomorrow at Zion Nat’l Park from some of our group who went this  afternoon.

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We are leaving Brentwood RV Resort,Hurricane,UT.  For; Panguitch KOA Park, Panguitch,UT. We pulled our RV over to an overflow area and dropped it off. We drove  34 miles to Zion Nat’l Park this morning.

Zion Nat'l Park

We got there at 8:45am and the visitors center was open. We toured the center and picked up any infornation we needed and left for the Park. We drove around the Park and it was great.We drove over to the “River Walk”,walking trail just as it started to rain so we returned to the park and picked up our RV. We headed out to our next park. The scenery on the way was outstanding.The Park put on a good ” ice cream get together” at 6:00 pm. We won a coffee cup on one of the drawings, (Everyone won something).

I started to set the alarm for 6:00am, but June talked me into changing it to 7:00am so she could get a little more sleep. At 7:00am I got up, turned on the heater & coffee. There was frost on top of the cars (and we were complaining about the heat  just yesterday and running the a/c). We drove into Bryce Canyon Nat’l Park around noon and drove out to the end at Rainbow Point, checked out the visitors center, then drove back,  stopping at all of the “Over-looks”, 18 miles at 35 mph (thePark speed limit). All of the overlooks are on the  return side of the road

Bryce Canyon

.The views from all of the over-looks were just out-standing. Bryce is not really a canyon, but “14 Amphitheaters of color-eroded limestone pinnacles and spires called Hoodoos”. The Red, Pink and Orange colors of the limestone constantly change with the sun, making the landscape come alive. The Indians called it “Red Rocks Standing Like Men in a Bowl-ShapedCanyon”. Indian legend has it that long ago there lived in the area, animal-like creatures that could change into people. “They were evil so Coyote turned them all into Stone”. On the way back we fueled up. We had a Bar-B-Que at the park. It was very good. We had our travel meeting afterwards. >

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We are leaving Panguitch, KOA Park, Panguitch, UT. For; Canyonland Campground, Moab, UT. There can be no question, but that it is cold this morning. 25 degrees F. We were the last ones out of the campground, as usual. My sweet wife did a great job of starting of us out on our trip. She topped the summit at Fishlake Nat’l Park (not our stop), at 7,923 ft. with no problem at all. We chose not to take the senic, by way of  Rte-12 & Rte-24, because of the steep grades reported  up to 12 % from my  Mountain Dictionary- Ken was told that the dictionary was wrong, that there no grades steeper than 8%. The people that did go that way said that we made a good decision, because there were 12%  grades that we would have had  major problems  with.  (I,m glad that we have a Mountain Directionary, it sure does come in handy.) We had a very scenic trip going US-89, I-70 & Rte-191. We pulled into an “over-view ” for lunch. The view from there was out-standing. We met some of our group when we fueled up at Green River. We tried to join them, but they ran off and left us. We checked into the campground and set up. Very short sites and kind of cramped with trees. Tomorrow we are going white water rafting on the Colorado River. >

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We are up and ready to go White Water Rafting on the Colorado River today.

Jetting the Colorado

The Colorado River

With memories of the White Water Rafting trip that we took several years ago on the Penobscot River in Maine, we were ready when the bus picked us up at 8:00am. We were on the first trip. The other half wanted to see the “Arches”, some 30 miles away. We knew that it wasn’t going to be as exciting as the “Penobscot River” trip when we didn’t get helmets and the guide was the only one with an oar. However, it was fun, with beautiful scenery. Our  guide did a excellent job explaining the landscape as we went downriver. ( The only bad thing about the trip was the “Port-a potty”. Man-O-Man, was that “Ripe” ). After the rafting trip was over, we returned to the campground. I think that we have a couple of  “glo-plugs” bad. I have been plugging in the crankcase heater each night and the truck starts on the coldest mornings with no problems.

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Today we got up, had breakfast and got ready for our trip down the Colorado River on a Jet Boat. The Bus picked us up at 11:00am and took us down stream about 15 miles from where we went rafting. The canyons in this area are fantastic. When we arrived at the Boat Launch Area, they had  a Picknic Table set up under some trees with lunch . After lunch, we boarded the  Jet Boats and headed down River. The canyons were unbelivable! Our guide John stopped several times to give us a Geology lessons on the different layers of formations. He appeared to be very knowledgeable and he certainly had our interest. We took a lot of pictures on the trip. On the way we stopped at an area of wall covered with black magnesium oxide. There were some petroglyphs etched through the black into the Red sandstone….when we got back to our campground and got cleaned up, we took our crock- pot over to our groups pot luck dinner. It was good. Today is June’s Birthday. Everyone sang “Happy Birthday” to her and she got a bunch of cards which made her very happy. >

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We are leaving Canyanland campground, Moab,UT for:United campground, Duranango,Co. This morning everyone had to take turns pulling out. Because of the short camp sites, the 5th wheel trucks stuck out into the road, so they pulled out first. June was driving the 1st half of the trip. She never got out of 3rd gear for the first 20 minutes. we were climbing from 4,000ft to 6,000ft. It was a pretty much an  un-eventful trip. We finally got to the campground and checked in. >

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We were up at 5:00 am to get ready for our 7:00am Bus trip down to the train station in Durango. From there we take a narrow gauge Railroad train ride to  Silverton, Co., up in the mountains. We will return this afternoon by Bus. The train ride itself wasn’t too comfortable, but the scenery was great. It was a 31/2 hour ride on hard narrow straight back seats. Open the window and you get covered with soo. We had 2 1/2 hours to look around Silverton before the bus  picked us up for the trip back. There really isn’t much up here but restaurants, Gift Shops and history. June bought presents for our kids. >

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We are going to Mesa Verde Nat’l Park. It is about a 45 minute trip to get to the visitors center.  We had our own guide on the bus and he was very knowledgeable.

Mesa Verde Cliff Dwellers

At  Mesa Verde are  ancient multistoried dwellings that fill the cliff-rock alcoves that may rise 2,000 ft. above Montezuma valley. The Anasazi (Ancient Ones) began to settle on the top about AD 750. Around 1200 they moved into the recesses in the cliffs. Around 1270 they moved out for unknown reasons.They had a high degree of skills as craftmen. The condition of the dwellings today confirms this. We returned back pretty well worn out. >

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We are leaving United Campground, Durango,Co. for; Gouldings Motel & RV Park, Monument Valley,UT. The first 20 miles we stayed in 3rd gear because it was a little hilly. We arrived with only about 1/4 of our fuel left in our tanks. We were driving into a head wind most of the way. (This is why we carry two spare 12 gallon cans of diesel, protected in the back ). The scenery from our campsite overlooking MonumentValley is wonderful.

Mount Rainier National Park

In National Parks on April 20, 2011 at 7:50 am


I wish that I had a computer back in the days when we were traveling. Being from the
east coast,we had a limited idea of what we would try to see while on the west coast.
Unfortunately, Mt. Rainier did not make our list of places to visit and Mt. Hood did.
We regret not visiting Mt. Rainier, but thats life! We did the best that we could  in the
seven  months that we travel each summer.

This is some of the information that I have located on Mount Rainier National Park.

Don’t miss out seeing this beautiful park. It is certainly worth the effort.

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Mount Rainier is a massive stratovolcano located 54 miles (87 km) southeast of SeattleUnited States. It is the most prominent mountain in the contiguous United States and the Cascade Volcanic Arc, with a summit elevation of 14,411 feet (4,392 m).[1][2] Mt. Rainier is considered one of the most dangerous volcanoes in the world, and it is on the Decade Volcano list.[7] Because of its large amount of glacial ice, Mt. Rainier could potentially produce massive lahars that would threaten the whole Puyallup River valley.
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The summit cone formed incrementally as lava and ash gushed from a vent in the Earth thousands of times, filling the surrounding canyons and increasing the footprint of the mountain. The top of the still-active volcano named Mount Rainier once topped 16,000 feet, but the effects of the harsh weather at high elevations in west-central Washington lowered the mountain’s skyward reach, only for eruptions over the last two millennia to build the summit back up to its current height of 14,411 feet above sea level. Mount Rainier’s last eruption occurred about 100 years ago.
So impressive is Mount Rainier’s hulking presence that it dominates the skyline for 100 miles, dwarfing other Cascade Range peaks and luring tourists to its high-elevation bounties. Located 95 miles from Seattle and 70 miles from Tacoma, Mount Rainier National Park so successfully draws lovers of the outdoors to its 235,625 acres, that astute visitors avoid much of the traffic on the roads and the crowds on the trails by exploring the park during midweek.
Of course, these roads and trails are busy for a good reason: This national park delivers extraordinary year-round recreation, from mountaineers improving their ice-climbing  skills to photographers determined to capture the park’s essence in shots of wildflowers, woods and waterfalls. Snowshoeing and cross-country skiing  abound in the winter, and July and August bring the most colorful blooms of wildflowers.
Visitors who explore the park sometime between early July and early October should begin in the southwest Nisqually entrance, then drive to Paradise and Sunrise, stopping to appreciate the wildflowers, when in bloom.If time permits, travelers who like to hike may want to park at the entrance at Carbon River, in the northwest corner, hike to the self-guided Carbon River Rain Forest Trail, then launch into the much more difficult 18 mile round-trip hike through Douglas firs and Sitka spruce along the Carbon Glacier Trail.
No matter where visitors direct their boots in the day-time, they can spend their nights in any of the three campgrounds, all with 14 day limits. No hook-ups exist, but with Mount Rainier as a backdrop, a stay here can hardly be called roughing it.

For campgrounds with hook-ups, check out the four campgrounds of Tacoma Power listed below.





Tacoma Power CampgroundsTacoma Power operates 4 excellent campgrounds to the SE of Mount Rainier National
Park on Alder Lake and Mayfield Lake reservoirs.  The campgrounds feature full hook-up’s and swimming, boating, and excellent campsite facilities.

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Mayfield Lake ParkYear-round day use area and boat launch.
Campsites open between April 15 and October 15
55 individual campsites (Water/electric hookups)
12-unit group camp area – Memorial Day – Oct. 15
Fire rings and picnic tables in all campsites
Coin-operated showers
Wheelchair-accessible restroom
Reservable kitchen shelter.

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Alder Lake Park  Download BrochureYear-round camping at 173 campsites
37 with water, electric and sewer hookups
74 with water and electric hookups
62 tent sites
20-site group camp area – full hookups
Two boat launches open year round
Fire rings and picnic tables in all campsites
Coin-operated showers
Wheelchair accessible restrooms
Water faucets throughout campground.

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Taidnapam ParkYear-round camping and day-use area
67 individual campsites
17 with water, electric and sewer hookups
34 with water and electric hookups
16 walk-in tent sites
22-site group camp area
18 with water, electric and sewer hookups
4 with water and electric hookups
Boat launch open mid-May through mid-September
Fire rings and picnic tables in all campsites
Coin-operated showers
Wheelchair accessible restrooms.

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Mossy Rock ParkYear-round camping, day use area and boat launch
152 individual campsites (76 with full hookups)
Two group camp areas
60-site group camp (35 with electric hookups)
10-site primitive group camp (no hookups)
Fire rings and picnic tables in all campsites
Coin-operated showers
Laundry facilities
Store and fast-food concession stand (seasonal)
Wheelchair accessible restrooms
Water faucets throughout campground
Reservable kitchen shelter.

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Now here you have it, everything that you need to know for a great camping experience!  GO FOR IT!!!



The $250.00 stimulus check!

In Uncategorized on April 15, 2011 at 10:27 am
STIMULUS CHECK
 Many of you people out there, reading the information
put out by our government, just may not understand the
Stimulus Check payout plan very clearly. I found this
explaination on the internet and it seems to make
everything quite clear.
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Just in case you are a senior citizen and have received  a
check for $250 . This is a very exciting program. I’ll
explain it by using the Q and A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to
     taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From the taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a tiny,little bit.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a
     high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of Asia?
A. Shut up!  You  got your check.
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Here are some helpful advice on how to best
help our economy by spending your stimulus
check wisely:
1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your
    money will go to China.
2 .If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to
    Saudi Arabia.
3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India.
4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to
    Mexico, Honduras or Guatemala.
5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to
    Taiwan.
7. If you pay off your credit cards. or buy stock, it will
    go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in
    offshore accounts.
Or, you can keep the money in”America”by
doing the following;
1. Spending it at yard sales or flea markets.
2. Going to baseball, basketball or football games.
3. Hiring prostitutes.
4. Buying cheap beer.
5. Getting tattoos.
These are the wholly-American-owned businesses still
operating in the U.S.
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Conclusion:
The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a
ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale
and drink beer all day until you are drunk enough to
get tatooed.

Dale Visits a Nudist Camp

In Uncategorized on April 14, 2011 at 12:12 pm

I was reading an article in my AARP Bulletin on Eldercare. At the end, it said to go to – “aarp.com” for more information.In among that information I found this Blog! After reading it,my mind instantly went back to the days when I was 17.What would I have done if there had been a “Nudist camp” close to the small Town that I grew up in??(I won’t tell you where my mind went from there).Anyway,it was an enjoyable blog to read. Here it is.

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lundclub10-11-104:02 PMEDT

DALE SNEAKS INTO A NUDIST CAMP
Imagine you moved into a large house and were told that you have free run of the whole place–except for the room on the left at the top of the stairs. That door would be always locked. What room would then occupy your thoughts more than any other?
I was seventeen. It was 1966. We had moved to Sultan, Washington the previous summer, my Dad, a minister, being assigned to that parish. I heard rumors that there was a nudist camp near Sultan, but I didn’t yet know where. Then came an article in the “Everett Herald” about nudism.It mentioned the Lake Associates nudist camp on the Sultan Basin Road, and also Fraternity Snoqualmie, a large nudist camp “four miles south of Issaquah.” That’s all I knew, but it was enough. I had never been to Issaquah, a town 43 miles south of Sultan, on Highway 90. I would find it.
I told my parents I was going camping for the weekend, loaded up my bicycle saddlebags with camping gear, and pedaled off. I rode my bike out of Sultan, then ditched it and the supplies deep in the underbrush, out of sight, and walked out to the shoulder of the highway and, carrying only a coat, stuck out my thumb.
Fortunately I’ve always looked younger than my age, and it’s not difficult for a boy to hitch rides. It was Friday evening, though, when I was dropped off in Issaquah–too late to try to find Fraternity Snoqualmie–but I walked around the town until finding that only one main highway headed south, and so assumed that was to be my route the next morning.
Night came on. I went into the entranceway of the Issaquah High School and lay down on the concrete porch, with only my coat for warmth. Although it was summer, the nights were cool, but it was the hard concrete that finally got to me. With all my joints aching, I got up sometime in the night and went looking for a better place to sleep. I came upon a parsonage, and being a preacher’s kid and knowing about a minister’s kindness and charity, if I were caught, I stepped into the back yard and lay on the lawn. The hard ground was a lot softer than the concrete, and I slept.
At dawn I was wet with dew, and cold. Before the parsonage household woke up, I was eating a cheap breakfast purchased at a local market. And dried out by the morning sun and with a full stomach, I hitchhiked south out of town.
I couldn’t very well tell the driver who picked me up to take me to the nearest nudist camp, nor was I even sure it was the right way. I just said that I was going to a friend’s house a few miles down the highway, and then stared at the roadside to see any sign of Fraternity Snoqualmie. To my excited delight, there it was, right out there in plain view–a sign on the left of the highway with the camp’s name on it, next to a long driveway going up the hill. Not wanting to be obvious, I waited about a half-mile farther before saying, “Here it is. Here’s his house. Thank you.” He dropped me off, and I acted like I was walking to a house. When he drove out of sight, I came back out to the highway and walked north to the road leading to what was described as the largest nudist camp in the Northwest.
It turned out to be a long, long driveway–quite a hike on foot. I stepped quietly in order to hear any approaching car, and when hearing one, I quickly slipped into the underbrush and hid as it went by, peering out and imagining that soon that family in the car will all be naked. It seemed unreal–too good to be true. Further up, I came to a stretch in the road that had a cliff on one side and a dirt wall on the other, and dreaded anyone coming then. To my horror, I heard footsteps! A man was walking down the road and coming toward me, around the bend still out of sight. I had nowhere to go. I hated the thought of running back down the hill, and besides, he was now too close to avoid. He would see me running down the hill when he rounded the bend. There was only a small, scraggly bush growing out of the dirt wall, and I hid behind it hopelessly. Not only could someone see me through the bush, but when even with me I wouldn’t even be behind it, but beside it, in plain view. I hid as best I could, and stayed perfectly still. Miraculously, the man walked by focusing on the road several feet in front of him, and never saw me! As I continued my hike, I wondered why a man was walking down that road anyway. Perhaps he had sneaked in, like me, and was leaving. Or perhaps he was hiking and would have enjoyed throwing a trespasser off the cliff.
Eventually I could hear people. Adults and children were both laughing and shouting, and it sounded like many of them. The road took a turn to the left and I glimpsed a gatehouse and jumped back, then left the road and made my way through the woods. Western Washington State woods are full of heavy underbrush, which is wonderful for someone trying not to be seen. But for some reason when I sneak, I get a nervous stomach; and often when I get a nervous stomach, I have to poop. It came on strong, and there was nothing I could do about it but squat down and go. No toilet paper. I picked large leaves from a tree and did my best to wipe. The leaves were thin. It was not a good experience.
I continued through the woods, following the sounds of the people, and finally came to the open grounds of Fraternity Snoqualmie. There was a broken-down school bus at the edge of the clearing, with no one in the immediate vicinity, and behind this bus I took off all my clothes except for my shoes and hid my clothes beneath a big board. I then, for the first time in my life, walked out into the view of men, women and children, stark naked.
As I walked down a driveway toward the crowds, I saw a woman coming toward me, walking up the same driveway. Moments later, I passed the first nude woman I’d ever really seen. She was probably in her forties, slightly heavy-set, but not unattractive. Her breasts swayed gracefully as she walked. She ignored me as though passing me on a city sidewalk, but I ogled her as much as I subtly could, and suddenly a problem arose. I knew by then, somehow, that an erection is not quite proper in a nudist camp, and was horrified to see a man now walking up the driveway. Suddenly I had a great idea. Nudists sunbathe! I could pretend I was sunbathing. So I scurried over and lay belly down on the grass beside the driveway, with my cheek resting on my hands and my eyes watching the man. As he passed by, he gave me an odd look. Later I figured out why: Never having been nude in the sun before, I was almost sickeningly white, except for my hands and face (I even wore long-sleeve shirts as a rule), and on my feet I wore, not only shoes, but black leather dress shoes, the ones I wore to church! And to top it off, leaves do not toilet paper make. It was in a restroom there, that I discovered I had poop smeared on my butt. That man was very kind only to give me an odd look. Oh, yes, one more thing: They have an area for sunbathing. I was lying in the parking lot.
When my problem went down, I got up and walked closer to the crowds, only to have the problem arise again. This time I just sat on the ground and blocked the problem with my legs. I was near the restroom then. Naked men and woman and children were going in and out, and during a pausein people I slipped into the restroom and into a stall to rest (and use real toilet paper). Some wet paper towels later, I walked out into virtual public in only my shoes. (I’ve heard many people have nightmares about being suddenly naked in public. Curiously, I’ve had these dreams, too, but they have always been good dreams.)
As it turned out, this was the weekend of Fraternity Snoqualmie’s annual Seafair celebration, and the park was packed! There were hundreds of people there–naked people! In less than twenty minutes I overcame my problem, and I began to meander through the many visitors–a very white boy with tan hands and face, wearing black dress shoes, trying to fit in.
And somehow I did. It was as if I were invisible. I sat around among the people, waited in line at the snack bar, having returned to my clothes to get some money from my pants pocket, and no one even spoke to me.
I remembered how traumatic it was the first time I had to undress in front of others. Only I had seen myself since puberty, and I thought I looked funny. People would surely laugh if they saw me, right? Then came P.E. in junior high, and I was required to shower after class with two dozen other boys. This was a dreadful experience for a sheltered, preacher’s kid. Other boys seemed to take it in stride, laughing and joking and talking about teachers and school and sports and TV shows. Of course they looked okay. I looked funny. But then no one laughed at me. Most of them were circumcised, many weren’t, it was just one or the other, no big deal. Some had smaller genitals than I, some larger. There were varying degrees and areas of tan, some different colors of skin. A lot of boys were fatter than I and jiggled when they walked. Some were really skinny. Really, I didn’t look that funny after all. And pretty soon I, too, was laughing and joking and talking about teachers and school and sports and TV shows. Taking showers in school became easy for me, although having other boys snap me with towels was hard to get used to.
Now I was having some of those old feelings. Maybe women would laugh at me, maybe children would. For sure, this time, I did look funny, with my odd tan and dress shoes. But no one laughed. I was as accepted as anyone.
And I saw that TV commercials and magazines had been very narrow in portraying the human body. It turns out that bodies are as varied as faces. Here it was like someone took a city block of people and stripped them all. But no one was embarrassed. No one ridiculed. All were accepted, even the obese people whose fat hung downenough to cover their genitals. These people would have had fun with the fig leaf idea in the Garden of Eden.
There was a volleyball game going on, so I went over to watch it, sitting down on a wooden bench right next to a very extroverted girl about eighteen or nineteen who was shouting out advice to theplayers. She leaned back and rested her arms on the back of the bench, almost touching me, with her large, firm breasts poking right out there only two feet from my wandering eyes. But my problem didn’t arise. I was relaxed. I was having a good time.
Later I went over finally to take a dip in the large swimming pool. I took off my shoes and set them on the grass, and enjoyed the water. Meanwhile I noticed a couple men sitting nearby watching me. They looked like they might suspect me. Their dark glasses made them look like some kind of agents. When I got out to dry in the sun, they beckoned me to come over to them. I did, and one of them asked me, “What club do you belong to?”
“The Lake Associates at Sultan,” I said.
“You’re pretty white,” he said.
“Yeah,” I said. “We don’t really get up there that often.”
“How do you like it there?” the other asked me.
“Oh, it’s okay,” I said. “It’s just a lake mainly.”
He nodded slightly, and the two seemed fairly satisfied. Either they were checking me out, or just simply curious why I was such a white guy with tan hands and face. I got up and walked away, then my tender feet reminded me. I came back, looking over at the two men and said, “I forgot my shoes,” picked them up, and walked off with them in my hand.
I continued to enjoy the warm, sunny day. It wasn’t long before the novelty of nudity wore off, and I simply felt, for lack of a better word, released. Curiosity turned into appreciation. Trespassing, amidst hundreds of strangers, I felt incredibly free. I was now completely relaxed about my body.These beautiful people accepted themselves, and me. That distracted tightness seen so commonly in the faces of people on the street was not seen here. People seemed real, open, relaxed, happy. Even that first day, that first real nudist experience, I eventually disregarded the fact that we were naked, and was just encouraged by a joyful presence of humanity I had never seen before.
Later in the day, I took a walk around the grounds, walking back up the parking lot and around the vacation trailers. A nude mother stepped out of one and asked me, “Have you seen my kids? Lunch is ready and they’re off somewhere.” She assumed I somehow knew her kids. I acted like I did, but told her I hadn’t seen them, and walked on while she peered from her doorway down the hill and over the crowds. I had lived a life full of inhibitions and embarrassment, was now lying and trespassing in order to overcome it, and this lady’s worry was that her kids were having so much fun that they’d be late for lunch. This was a beautiful and wonderful place to be.
Later that afternoon, I glanced at my shoulders and saw they were reddening. I had never thought to bring sun block lotion, and my pale skin was sensitive. I had exposed it to the sun for seven hours! So, it was, sadly, time for me to leave. Perhaps some people noticed the red boy with tan hands and face walking in his black leather oxfords up toward the broken-down school bus. My clothes were thankfully still under the board behind the bus. It felt constricting and lousy putting them on, my sunburn of course not helping, and I crackled my way back through the underbrush. As I walked down the long road toward the highway, I dashed into the brush a couple times to hide from passing cars. But this time, peering out, instead of thinking that the people in each car would soon all be naked, I thought only how fortunate they are. They had the key to that room on the left at the top of the stairs, and it was a good room.
I hitchhiked back to Sultan, arriving that evening, retrieved my bicycle from the underbrush, and rode home. It was hard to hide my sunburn and it bothered me terribly for days. Telling Mom I had gone without a shirt while camping, she rubbed lotion on my burned back, too polite to comment about the burn extending down into my pants.

I will bet that you didn’t know!

In Interesting Information, Uncategorized on April 14, 2011 at 12:16 am

You’re gonna say, “I didn’t know that!”  at least 5 times. Really neat stuff here.

(Alaska) More than half of the coastline of the entire United States is in Alaska.

(Chicago) Next to Warsaw, Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world.

(Detroit) Woodward Avenue in Detroit, Michigan, carries the designation M-1, so named because it was the first paved road anywhere.

(Damascus,  Syria) Damascus, Syria, was flourishing a couple of thousand years before Rome was founded in 753 BC, making it the oldest continuously inhabited city in existence.

(Istanbul,  Turkey) Istanbul, Turkey, is the only city in the world located on two continents.

(Los  Angeles) Los  Angeles ‘  full name is: El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles de  Porciuncula– and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size: L.A.

(New  York  City) The term ‘The Big Apple’ was coined by touring  jazz  musicians of the 1930s who used the slang expression ‘apple’ for any town or city. Therefore, to play New York  City is to play the  big time – The Big Apple.

There are more Irish in New York City than in Dublin, Ireland; more Italians in New York  City than in  Rome, Italy; and more Jews in New York  City than in Tel  Aviv , Israel.

(Ohio) There are no natural lakes in the state of Ohio, every one is manmade.

(Pitcairn  Island) The smallest island with country status is Pitcairn in  Polynesia, at just 1.75  sq. miles/4,53 sq. km.

(Rome) The first city to reach a population of 1 million people was Rome, Italy in 133 B.C.  There is a city called Rome on every continent.

(Siberia) Siberia contains more than 25% of the world’s forests.

(S.M.O.M.) The actual smallest sovereign entity in the world is the Sovereign Military Order of Malta  (S.M.O.M). It is located in the city of Rome, Italy, has an area of two tennis courts.

Nantucket as a Duty Station!

In Information-Interesting on April 10, 2011 at 6:45 pm
d

Charles M. Morgan-Whaling Ship

The last year of my enlistment (1953) was fantastic. I was assigned to the Loran station at Siasconset on Nantucket Island , off the coast of Massachusetts.  We rented a two bedroom house right on the beach in Siasconset, between the ocean and the bluffs. What a stroke of luck we had here. In looking for a place to bring my wife with our  five month old  son, I came across a  Lady (who lived off of the Island) and who had just bought an old house that had not been lived in for the past ten years, as an investment. I needed a house to live in and she needed her investment  fixed up. We came to an agreement. She would buy the necessary supplies and I would repair and paint the inside of the house. I would also paint the outside trim and make any other repairs necessary.In exchange I would pay a very reasonable rent.

We absolutely fell in love with Nantucket and with the Islanders. We met and became friends with several families. We had  cook outs and played cards with our new friends and covered about every part of the island from lighthouses to swimming beaches.We found relatives I didn’t know we had, wanting to visit for a week- end during the summer!. In the winter we collected driftwood and any thing else that came ashore after a storm. We hired out in the spring to help the summer people to open their homes, doing cleaning , painting and small repairs in our spare time.

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Here are some very brief facts  and history of Nantucket Island!

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Nantucket cobble stone streets

The National Historic District  has architecturally changed very little since the 17th century.  Seaside cottages and old-fashioned lamps still line its streets.

The three Brothers Buildings

At the harbor front, where the great whaling ships set out on their hazardous journeys to return years later – if at all -is now filled with  pleasure boats that find safe harbor in one of the finest docking facilities in the world.

When you go inland on this idyllic “elbow of sand,” the wild moors open to the endless sky. Nearly 40 percent of Nantucket Island is protected conservation land. Several areas and habitats, natural groups of plants and animals, are rare to this region and even the world.

Walk the wide sandy beaches, as beautiful as any in the world. Swim in the still, cool, sparkling waters of Nantucket Sound to the north. Sign on for a guided tour of the island or pick up a picnic lunch and rent a bike or a jeep and discover Nantucket  for yourself. (A 4-wheel jeep will get you to places that you can not possibility take a car without getting stuck in the beach sand).

Restaurants abound whether for a beach picnic, an informal meal, or gourmet fare in sophistic surrounding, there is something for everyone. How about a clambake prepared to your order. Fresh Nantucket bay scallop, provides unforgettable dining.

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Originally a booming whaling port, Nantucket has been named a National Historic District and has architecturally changed little since the 17th century.

The island’s beginnings in western history can be  traced to its reported sighting by Norsemen in the 11th century. But  it was not until 1602  that Captain Bartholomew Gosnold of  Falmouth, England sailed his bark, Concord, past the bluffs of Siasconset and really put Nantucket on the map. The island’s  original inhabitants, the Wampanoag Indians, lived undisturbed until 1641 when the island was deeded by the English (the authorities in control of the land from the coast of Maine to New York) to Thomas Mayhew and his son, merchants of Watertown and Martha’s Vineyard.

As Europeans began to settle in the area around Cape Cod, the island became a place of refuge for regional Indians, as Nantucket was not yet discovered by white men. The growing population of  Native Americans welcomed seasonal groups of  Indians who traveled to the  island to fish and later harvest whales that washed up on shore. At this time, the true demise of the island’s Indian population began. The English presence drastically changed the healthy Indian population and over the next century, the Wampanoag would be weakened by disease, alcohol and servitude.

Before ultimately settling on the shores of the Great Harbor, the new English settlers moved to the land surrounding the small sheltered harbor of Capaum Pond, on the north shore, where the first white settlement, Sherburne, was established. In 1795, the town (now nestled on the Great Harbor) was named Nantucket (Wampanoag for “faraway land”) and became unique in the country as an island, a county and a town, all with the same name. Shortly after 1700, Quakerism began to take root and by the end of the eighteenth century, the  society of friends was the major denomination on the island, a refuge for Quakers being persecuted in other areas of the Bay Colony. The Nantucket Quakers also became extremely influential in business and government matters. The simple, sturdy dwellings have been continuously occupied and stand today in pristine ranks along cobblestone Main Street and other lanes and byways. Later, with the influence generated by the whaling industry, merchants and  master mariners built their homes with an eye to impress their neighbors.

For nearly a 100 years-from the mid-1700’s to the late 1830’s, the island was the whaling capital of the world ,  with as many as 150 ships making port in Nantucket during its peak. Within decades, however, the new wealth from whale oil drastically took a turn for the worst, upon the advent of petroleum in 1838 when it began to replace whale oil as an illuminate, and the sperm whale itself had been harder to find. In 1846, a “Great Fire” roared through Nantucket Town under the cover of night, leaving hundreds homeless and impoverished. When gold was discovered in California, shiploads of Nantucketers left to seek new fortunes. In the thirty years of 1840 to 1870, census figures document the loss of 60 percent of the island’s population, which plunged from an estimated 10,000 to 4,000. The death knell for whaling had been sounded. The last ship outbound from Nantucket in search of the giant sperm whale left in 1869, never to return to her home port.

Passenger Ship

Nantucket Island

Nantucket was a port-of-call for transatlantic packets and coastal vessels from the early 1800’s and, indeed, ranked third only after New York and Boston as a  major port. When the whaling era ended, commercial shipping gave way to recreational boating. Daily excursions from the mainland on the graceful old steamers brought a new breed to Nantucket – the summer visitors. The first generation of “developers” on Nantucket sang the praises of pure air and saltwater bathing for health and pleasure. They built cottages and summer houses, advertising them in the Boston and New York newspapers. Island housewives took in summer boarders and great hotels were built in town, as well as on the seashore at Brant Point, Surfside, and Siasconset. It was not until around 1990 that the american tradition of summer vacations was firmly established, and it was then that Nantucket was discovered to be just about the ideal spot for vacationing. Once entrenched, tourism became the principle source of income for island residents. It still is and in the last two decades Nantucket’s tourist season has extended from before Memorial Day to after Columbus Day, Increasingly, visitors are also attracted by the quiet beauty of the off-season, and can be assured of finding comfortable accommodations no matter what time of year.

A word of caution if you are driving on the “cobblestone” streets of Nantucket, drive slow! The cobblestones’ will jar your teeth loose!

(Most of the above information  came from Nantucket Island Chamber of Commerce.

How April 1st Hoax’s Began!

In Uncategorized on March 30, 2011 at 12:02 am

“The hoax of the century”
TUESDAY, MARCH 29, 2011
April 1st hoax’s began from a 1938 Radio Show!
Two things combined to create mass panic, firstly many listeners did not hear the start of the program, which introduced Orson Wells as reading from the H.G.Wells book, ‘The War of the Worlds’.  Secondly, there was no chance of switching on CNN news for corroboration, just the mesmeric effect of the radio.

Here is a verbatim script of what listeners heard when they tuned in about 10 minutes after the program started.

ANNOUNCER A

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. From the Meridian Room in the Park Plaza Hotel in New York City, we bring you the music of Ramón Raquello and his orchestra. With a touch of the Spanish, Ramón Raquello leads off with ‘ La Cumparsita.’

(‘ LA CUMPARSITA’ STARTS PLAYING, THEN QUICKLY FADES OUT)

ANNOUNCER B

Ladies and gentlemen, we interrupt our program of dance music to bring you a special bulletin from the Intercontinental Radio News.

At twenty minutes before eight, central time, Professor Farrell of the Mount Jennings Observatory, Chicago, Illinois, reports observing several explosions of incandescent gas, occurring at regular intervals on the planet Mars. The spectroscope indicates the gas to be hydrogen and moving towards the earth with enormous velocity.

Professor Pierson of the Observatory at Princeton confirms Farrell’s observation, and describes the phenomenon as, quote, ‘like a jet of blue flame shot from a gun, ‘unquote.

We now return you to the music of Ramón Raquello, playing for you in the Meridian Room of the Park Plaza Hotel, situated in downtown New York.
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War of the Worlds, Orson Welles, And The Invasion from Mars.The ability to confuse audiences en masse may have first become obvious as a result of one of the most infamous mistakes in history. It happened the day before Halloween, on Oct. 30, 1938, when millions of Americans tuned in to a popular radio program that featured plays directed by, and often starring, Orson Welles. The performance that evening was an adaptation of the science fiction novel The War of the Worlds, about a Martian invasion of the earth. But in adapting the book for a radio play, Welles made an important change: under his direction the play was written and performed so it would sound like a news broadcast about an invasion from Mars, a technique that, presumably, was intended to heighten the dramatic effect. As the play unfolded, dance music was interrupted a number of times by fake news bulletins reporting that a “huge flaming object” had dropped on a farm near Grovers Mill, New Jersey. As members of the audience sat on the edge of their collective seat, actors playing news announcers, officials and other roles one would expect to hear in a news report, described the landing of an invasion force from Mars and the destruction of the United States. The broadcast also contained a number of explanations that it was all a radio play, but if members of the audience missed a brief explanation at the beginning, the next one didn’t arrive until 40 minutes into the program. At one point in the broadcast, an actor in a studio, playing a newscaster in the field, described the emergence of one of the aliens from its spacecraft. “Good heavens, something’s wriggling out of the shadow like a gray snake,” he said, in an appropriately dramatic tone of voice. “Now it’s another one, and another. They look like tentacles to me. There, I can see the thing’s body. It’s large as a bear and it glistens like wet leather. But that face. It…it’s indescribable. I can hardly force myself to keep looking at it. The eyes are black and gleam like a serpent. The mouth is V-shaped with saliva dripping from its rimless lips that seem to quiver and pulsate….The thing is raising up. The crowd falls back. They’ve seen enough. This is the most extraordinary experience. I can’t find words. I’m pulling this microphone with me as I talk. I’ll have to stop the description until I’ve taken a new position. Hold on, will you please, I’ll be back in a minute.”As it listened to this simulation of a news broadcast, created with voice acting and sound effects, a portion of the audience concluded that it was hearing an actual news account of an invasion from Mars. People packed the roads, hid in cellars, loaded guns, even wrapped their heads in wet towels as protection from Martian poison gas, in an attempt to defend themselves against aliens, oblivious to the fact that they were acting out the role of the panic-stricken public that actually belonged in a radio play. Not unlike Stanislaw Lem’s deluded populace, people were stuck in a kind of virtual world in which fiction was confused for fact. News of the panic (which was conveyed via genuine news reports) quickly generated a national scandal. There were calls, which never went anywhere, for government regulations of broadcasting to ensure that a similar incident wouldn’t happen again. The victims were also subjected to ridicule, a reaction that can commonly be found, today, when people are taken in by simulations. A cartoon in the New York World-Telegram, for example, portrayed a character who confuses the simulations of the entertainment industry with reality. In one box, the character is shown trying to stick his hand into the radio to shake hands with Amos n’ Andy. In another, he reports to a police officer that there is “Black magic!!! There’s a little wooden man — Charlie McCarthy — and he’s actually talking!”In a prescient column, in the New York Tribune, Dorothy Thompson foresaw that the broadcast revealed the way politicians could use the power of mass communications to create theatrical illusions, to manipulate the public.”All unwittingly, Mr. Orson Welles and the Mercury Theater of the Air have made one of the most fascinating and important demonstrations of all time,” she wrote. “They have proved that a few effective voices, accompanied by sound effects, can convince masses of people of a totally unreasonable, completely fantastic proposition as to create a nation-wide panic.”They have demonstrated more potently than any argument, demonstrated beyond a question of a doubt, the appalling dangers and enormous effectiveness of popular and theatrical demagoguery….”Hitler managed to scare all of Europe to its knees a month ago, but he at least had an army and an air force to back up his shrieking words.”But Mr. Welles scared thousands into demoralization with nothing at all.”In the 1950s, America had another taste of the power that simulations have, to draw people into a world of delusional fantasy, when paired with mass communications. This time it was revealed that a number of television game shows were simulations, in which contestants who knew the answers ahead of time were pretending to guess at their responses. But unlike the invasion from Mars, here the fakery was unambiguously intentional; it was the work of producers who had concluded they could create fictional game shows that would be more exciting than the real thing. Once again, there was a shocked reaction from the public. Once again, those involved became objects of public anger. And, as happened with the Orson Welles broadcast, an effort was made to ensure that such manipulations wouldn’t recur. But in 1990, it happened again. Audiences around the world discovered that they were taken in by the ultimate Hollywood illusion in which two performers faked their own talent, lip-syncing, to create the impression they were singing. What millions of fans had believed were two talented singers was actually a composite, another seamless interweaving of sensory simulations in which two people provided the visuals, while vocalists provided the audio. As in the previous two instances, there was a stunned response. But unlike the experience of 1938 or even the 1950s, the social context was different because simulations had become commonplace, and attempts to use them to trick the public were the rule rather than the exception. Also by this time, a global culture had developed, which meant that tens of millions of people around the world were drawn into the same illusion. One might say that War of the Worlds and the game show scandal foreshadowed the age of simulation that was still to come. Allowing for a little poetic overstatement, the Milli Vanilli scandal served as a rite of passage or symbolic marker, making clear that we now live in an age of simulation confusion in which our tendency to mistake fakes for what they imitate has become one of the characteristic problems of the age. More to the point, we live in a time in which the ability to create deceptive simulations, especially for television, has become essential to the exercise of power. And the inability to see through these deceptions has become a form of powerlessness. Those who let themselves be taken in by the multiple deceptions of politics, news, advertising and public relations, are doomed, like the more gullible members of the radio audience in 1938, to play a role in other people’s dramas, while mistakenly believing that they are reacting to something genuine.

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I give credit to:The main information for this blog was found  @ http://www.guy-sports.com/humor/urban-myth/hoax_alien.htm

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Crabby old man!-Not me!

In Uncategorized on March 25, 2011 at 1:06 pm

Crabby old men

When an old man died in the geniatric ward of a nursing home in North Platte,

Nebraska, it was believed that he had nothing of value.

Later, when the nurses were going through his meager possessions, they found this

poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and

distributed to every nurse in the hospital. One nurse took her copy to Missouri. The

old man’s sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of

the News Magazine of the St, Louis Association for Mental Health. A  slide

presentation has also been made based on his simple, but eloquent, poem.

And this little old man, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of

this ‘anonymous’ poem winging across the internet. Remember this poem when you

next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young

soul within.

“Crabby old Man”

What do you see nurses?…..What do you see?

What are you thinking…..when you’re looking at me?

A crabby old man…..not very wise,

Uncertain of habit…..with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles his food…..and makes no reply.

When you say in a loud voice…..’I do wish you’d try!’

Who seems not to notice…..the things that you do.

And forever is losing…..A sock or a shoe?

Who, resisting or not…..lets you do as you will,

With bathing and feeding…..The long day to fill?

Is that what you’re thinking…..Is that what you see?

Then open your eyes, nurse…..you’re not looking at me.

I’ll tell you who I am…..As I sit here so still,

As I do at your bidding,…..as I eat at your will.

I’m a small child of ten…..with a father and mother,

Brothers and sisters…..who love one another.

A young boy of sixteen…..with wings on his feet.

Dreaming that soon now…..a lover he’ll meet.

A groom soon at Twenty…..my heart gives a leap.

Remembering, the vows…..that I promised to keep.

At Twenty-Five, now…..I have young of my own.

Who need me to guide…..And a secure happy home.

A man of Thirty…..My young now growing fast,

Bound to each other…..With ties that should last.

At forty, my young sons…..have grown and are gone,

But my women’s beside me…..to see I don’t mourn.

At fifty, once more…..babies play ’round my knee,

Again we know children…..My loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me…..my wife is now dead.

I look at the future…..shudder with dread.

For my young are all rearing…..young of their own.

And I think of the years…..and the love that I’ve known.

I’m now an old man…..and nature is cruel

Tis jest to make old age…..look like a fool.

The body, it crumbles…..grace and vigor, depart.

There is now a stone…..where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass…..a young guy still sits

And now and again…..my battered heart swells.

I remember the joys…..I remember the pain.

And I’m loving and living…..life all over again.

I think of the years, all too few…..gone too fast.

And accept the stark fact…..that nothing can last.

So open your eyes, people…..open and see.

Not a crabby old man…..Look closer…see ME!!

Make this a SMILE Day!

In Humor on March 25, 2011 at 9:42 am

Over the past several years I have been saving good jokes and stories that tickle my funny bone. I read the “raunchy”jokes for my own amusement, but I do not save them and I would never(or hardly ever), publish them. Of course there is always a question as to what is “raunchy”, and if you should happen to read one of my Blogs and you are offended by any of my jokes, send me a comment to that fact and let me know!

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(There’ve been times when it felt like my WHOLE village was burning)

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him. Every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming.
Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect himself from the elements, and to store his few possessions. One day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames,with smoke rolling up to the sky. He felt the worst had happened, and everything was lost. He was stunned with disbelief, grief, and anger. He cried out, ‘God! How could you do this to me?’

Early the next day, he was awakened by the sound of a ship approaching the island! It had come to rescue him! ‘How did you know I was here?’ asked the weary man of his rescuers. ‘We saw your smoke signal,’ they replied.
The Moral of This Story:It’s easy to get discouraged when things are going bad, but we shouldn’t lose heart, because God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of our pain and suffering. Remember that the next time your little hut seems to be burning to the ground. It just may be a smoke signal that summons the Grace of God.
P.S. You may want to consider passing this on, because you never know who feels as if their hut is on fire today.

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My Quality Control Dept.

Final Quality Control Inspectors !

After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, “MOM, I’ve decided to become a minster when I grow up.”
“Thats okay with us, but what made you decide that?”
“Well,” said the little boy, “I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figured it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and listen.”
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A 6-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord’s Prayerat a church service, “And forgive us our trash passes,as we forgive those who passed trash against us.”
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A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon.”How do you know what to say?” he asked.’Why, God tells?””Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?”
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A  little girl became restless as the preacher’s sermom dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered,’Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?”

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After the christening of his baby brother in church, little Johnny sobbed all the way home in the backseat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, “That priest said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I want to stay with you guys!”

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Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. She was puzzeled by Kyle’s picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story that was meant to represent.”The flight to Egypt,” was his reply. Pointing at each figure, Ms.Terri said,” That must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus. But whos’s the fourth person?” “Oh, that’s Pontius the pilot!”  …………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
A college drama group presented a play in which one character would stand on a trap door and announce, ” I descend into hell!” A stagehand below would pull a rope, the trapdoor would spring, and the actor would drop from view.The play was well received. When the actor playingthe part became ill, another actor, who was quite overweight took his place, When the new actor announced, “I descend into hell ! ” the stagehand pulled the rope, and the actor began his plunge, but became hopelessly stuck. No amount of tugging onthe rope could make him desend. One student in the balcony jumped up and yelled:”Hallelujah! Hell is full!’ ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
A little girl was sitting on her grandfather’s lap as he read her a bedtime story. From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach upto touch his wrinkled cheek. She was alternatelystroking her own cheek, then his again. Finally she spoke up, “Grandpa, did God make you?””Yes, sweetheart,” he answered,”God made me along time ago.””Oh,” she paused, “grandpa, did God make me too?””Yes, indeed, honey,” he said, “God made you just a little while ago.”Feeling their respective faces again, she observed,”God’s getting better at it, isn’t he?”

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There was a knock on the door of a very “Elite” House of Ill-Repute. The lady of the home answered the door and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties.” May I help you?’ she asked. “I  want to see Valerie,” the man replied.”‘Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else,”said the madam. ‘No, I must see Valerie,” he replied, Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour , the man calmly left.

The next night,  the same man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained  that no one had ever come back two nights in a row-too expensive and there were no discounts. The price was still $5,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and again they went upstairs. After an hour, he left. The following night the man returned there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.

After their session, Valerie questioned the man.’No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?” she asked.The man replied, “‘South Carolina.”  “really”, she said. “I have family in South Carolina”.  “I know,” the man said. “your father died, and I am your sister’s attorney. She asked me to give you  your $15,000 inheritance.”

The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain: 1- Death , 2-Taxes , 3-Being screwed by a lawyer.

(And you thought that this was going be cut from the way it started!)

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On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed. This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate down-sizing, and he had been let go. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he’d be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he had been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million dollars.Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank worth over $2 million dollars, and she informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for the more than three decades that she had charged him for sex, these holdings had multiplied and that these were the results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million dollars, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,” if I had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!”

That’s when she shot him….You know, sometimes, men just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.

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Pull them by the hair or they fill up!

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A brief history of the “CAT”.
On the first day of creation, God created the cat….On the second day, God created man to serve the cat….On the third day, God created all the animals of the earth to serve aspotential food for the cat….
On the fourth day, God created honest toil so that man could laborfor the good of the cat….On the fifth day, God created the sparkle ball so that the cat mightor might not play with it….On the sixth day, God created veterinary science to keep the cathealthy and the man broke….On the seventh day, God tried to rest, but He had to scoop the litterbox….
Yes, it’s a cat’s world after all. Amen!

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