joysofdickandjune

The $250.00 stimulus check!

In Uncategorized on April 15, 2011 at 10:27 am
STIMULUS CHECK
 Many of you people out there, reading the information
put out by our government, just may not understand the
Stimulus Check payout plan very clearly. I found this
explaination on the internet and it seems to make
everything quite clear.
————————————————————————————————————————————————————–
Just in case you are a senior citizen and have received  a
check for $250 . This is a very exciting program. I’ll
explain it by using the Q and A format:
Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to
     taxpayers.
Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From the taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a tiny,little bit.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a
     high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of Asia?
A. Shut up!  You  got your check.
——————————————————————————-
Here are some helpful advice on how to best
help our economy by spending your stimulus
check wisely:
1. If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, your
    money will go to China.
2 .If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to
    Saudi Arabia.
3. If you purchase a computer, it will go to India.
4. If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to
    Mexico, Honduras or Guatemala.
5. If you buy a car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
6. If you purchase useless plastic stuff, it will go to
    Taiwan.
7. If you pay off your credit cards. or buy stock, it will
    go to pay management bonuses and be hidden in
    offshore accounts.
Or, you can keep the money in”America”by
doing the following;
1. Spending it at yard sales or flea markets.
2. Going to baseball, basketball or football games.
3. Hiring prostitutes.
4. Buying cheap beer.
5. Getting tattoos.
These are the wholly-American-owned businesses still
operating in the U.S.
——————————————————————————-
Conclusion:
The best way to stimulate the economy is to go to a
ball game with a prostitute that you met at a yard sale
and drink beer all day until you are drunk enough to
get tatooed.
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